The Watch Dog
In my apartment complex we have this lady (who just happens to live in the same building) who is the “watch dog” of the complex. Now, every complex needs someone to keep an eye on things, make sure there is no funny business going on and to keep everything in working order.
Here’s the issue with this “watch dog”, she ain’t good. Yup-I’m telling you how I really feel. Folks, she down right sucks!
There are a few reasons why I feel this way and I really think they are justified.
- When we first moved into our apartment, there were a lot of issues with people parking their cars in areas they weren’t suppose to. Some of these areas were no big deal, but some of them ended up blocking in other people’s cars and you couldn’t leave or sometime even get into your space. Everyone in the complex has an underground garage. Some of us have two car garages and some have one car garages. In addition everyone has one parking space up above. Now, you would think this is sufficient. Apparently not. French people, just like Americans tend to use their garage as just storage for stuff and then park their cars somewhere else. Well, we used our garage for storage the first few weeks until we could get settled and so we parked our car in our space above ground. There ended up being some chick who would park her huge BMW station wagon directly behind us and up on the curb, but her car was so big and the spaces so small that we couldn’t get our car out. This would piss me off so bad, cuz I didn’t know where in the complex she lived to go and tell her off. (This is where that Mickey Mouse ‘no parking’ flyer comes in real handy). It just so happened one day, that as Dude and I were trying to get our car out of its spot, the “watch dog” happened by. We rolled down the window and I expressed my dissatisfied self to her. She said it was a huge problem and it needed to be taken care of since these idiots couldn’t be courteous enough to fix it themselves and just not park any where they darn well pleased. What does this woman do to “fix” it?? She has some company come out and install road furniture all up and down the parking lot! What the heck! How is this gonna help?? Now these dump polls stick out from the curb a few feet and we still can’t get the car out easily because they are right behind us! Some fix. She swapped out one problem for the other. At least before, if you knew the person you could tell them to move their stupid car, but how the heck do you move the polls to get out! Lucky for us, we didn’t need to park there long. Benoit is now in the garage. Idiot dog, I tell you.
- Which brings me to my next issue. Remember the little situation about our “portail” being broken a while back and this woman couldn’t get anybody out to fix it the right way? Well, guess what? Since that stupid “portail” never works the underground garages have been broken into about 5 times since we moved in. That makes about 1 time for every 2 months! The poor guy next to us has had his garage broken into twice! Then we found out last week that the people on the second floor had their apartment broken into. If this lady was the “watch dog” that she pretends to be then she would have chased these guys and attacked. What does she do instead? Screw around with some dummy who can’t ever fix the gate. We have the lamest gate. Just put a new one in that actually works instead of continuously fooling around with the one that doesn’t. Lame watch dog.
- Then, just when the “portail” actually gets fixed, you wouldn’t believe it! The gate next to it (which is the pedestrian gate) is now broken. Normally there is a code to get in, but now anybody can just waltz right in cuz the lock on the gate in broke. Brilliant! This has been broken for about 6 weeks now, and the “watch dog” has done absolutely nothing to fix it. There has never been anyone out there to even look at it, let alone change the lock and make it secure. So people just come and go as they please. Who gives a care if the portail is now fixed! It just means you can’t drive your car INTO and OUT of the complex, but so what! You can still walk in, carry out all the toys you want, and just have your car waiting on the other side. Some security. Dumb watch dog.
- At the same time that the pedestrian gate broke, the front door to our apartment building stopped working. This door is supposed to be added security. You either type in a code or have a FOB on your key chain and run it over a pad next to the door and it unlocks to let you in. Well, the door no longer locks. You just walk right up and push on it and it opens. The dumb thing is, this lady lives right next to the front door and she has to walk in and out of it all day. Does she ever get anyone out there to fix it? What do you think? Bad dog!
- Our elevator broke over the weekend several weeks ago. All you needed to do was go to the elevator room and flip the switch to get it going again. Would she do it? Nope. We sat around for four days (because the Monday after the weekend was a holiday, of course) waiting for her dumb self to pay someone to come over for .05 seconds to flip the switch. Ahhhh! I am so annoyed now! Time to maybe put that dog out to pasture.
- If that wasn’t enough, this so-called “watch dog” was hanging out when Dude and I came back with our Europcar van rental late in the evening (from our run out to the new house). It was around 9pm which was too late to take the van back so we needed to keep it over night and give it back in the morning. Do you think we were able to park in our spot? No way. Wanna know why? Those damn polls were in the way and we couldn’t fit the van in our OWN parking spot. So Dude swings around back looking for a spot to park this thing and there happened to be a spot (but not a real one) that we could fit it in just for the night. Do you think we got the chance? Heck no! The “watch dog” came running out to her garden and says, “You can’t park there, you can’t park there. It’s illegal. You need to go park in your spot.” Freakin’ illegal? I don’t see a mandate anywhere! Then I told her that we couldn’t park in OUR spot because of her stupid polls and would she like to go remove them so we could. Then she says to go park it out front on the other side of the “portail”. Well we would have, if there was enough space to do so. That night someone happened to be having a party and all the spaces (which really aren’t spaces) were all taken up. What would she like me to do now? I really wanted to tell her off and that she really sucked eggs at being the “watch dog” and that she always concerned herself with stupid stuff and never the REAL issues, but I was my too nice self and didn’t. I think it might be time to put the dog down.
- Le Portail (backyardprovence.wordpress.com)